My First Religious Poem
The unknown distance to the Lord above,
stares back at my grieving frame,
to cast my shadow by the holy sun,
my spirit mourns with a sacred pain
All that stands between the soul's release,
this temporary flesh and bone,
I know that its over now,
I feel my broken heart begin to moan
Everytime you fell and everytime you tried,
every word you spoke and every tear you cried,
everything you loved and everyone you saved,
everybody's watching and everybody prayed
Everything you did for me rambles in my head,
I cry "stay dont leave me the stars can wait for you",
I'll stay strong and have faith in you for all my time ,
at my souls release,
I'll join you up above the world so high.

Comments:
 
dienamik   dienamik wrote
on 3/11/2012 9:47:08 PM
i also like the rhyme scheme, it told enough without telling too much, good!

Dorian_Gray   Dorian_Gray wrote
on 9/21/2011 3:45:23 PM
Very good. Just put it into stanzas and you will be all set (it was a little hard to read, but with stanzas it should be easier).

DarkAndDemented   DarkAndDemented wrote
on 9/18/2011 6:21:55 PM
God bless you too

DarkAndDemented
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writing DarkAndDemented
The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
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Synopsis
This is my first religious poem. I have never been a religious person but ever since I have been with my boyfriend thats changed. I had watched Passion of the Christ and it just really got to me. I hope it makes sense and isn't stupid
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